dimanche 20 décembre 2009

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

I've always loved Christmas. Some people get depressed by the end of october and until Spring comes back, and I must admit the lack of light also has that effect on me, but by the beginning of december something changes, maybe the Christmas lights in the streets, the smell of hot wine and cinnamon, or the look on the children's faces when they spot the colored shop windows... Or maybe just the thought that, however hard the year may have been, it's now coming to an end, letting room for a new one, full of hopes and expectations. I am an optimistic. I figure new year means new good stuff. 2009 was a cursed year for many people I know.
This year I lost my grandpa whom I loved dearly, I divorced the ony man I thought worthy of being given a chance at married life, I lost track of a very dear friend that I will always miss (and if you read these lines, I hope you are safe and happy, my favorite fake spouse) and lots of other little dramas and complications in my RL and SL.
Now that I look back at it, all I can think of is "wow! I survived". My friends say that I've changed this year, that I was forced to grow more mature and they're probably right, I never wanted to become a "grown up" because then, you get wrinkled, you get old and you die. But close to my 32nd birthday I have to admit it's actually not such a big deal, and I feel fine. All in all, I am thankful, this year I realised who really matter, and to all of them I send a huge hug: Eithne, my precious friend and shoulder to cry on, I wish that in 2010 none of us needs to cry on the other's shoulder (and that we meet, at last). Richy, mijn draak, without your laugh life would be less tasty, I wish you no hospital at all this year, for you and your family. Aryanna, Boaz, Kouse, Renee... please be always inspired in creating beautiful things, you are beautiful people.
Kiwi, Gertie, Chiller, Cux, Saffron, Lavendar, Rosalie, Darkmoon, Dawnbeam, Opacus, Tavia, Vox, Maplesky, Immortelle, Draggy, Ken, Tex, Daria... I wish you all something better in your lives, thank you for making my year less hard just by being my friends.

Now, what to hope, to expect, for the year to come?
  • that the people I love find peace and happiness, always have a roof above their heads and food in their plates, and be in good health
  • that the people who hurt or betrayed me realise how mean they have been and don't ever make anyone else suffer
  • that I can go back home, at last
  • that you, reader, have a wonderful year!

Me, myself and I... and blog posts

I'm being quite a loner on SL these days. I mainly log to catch goodies, take pics, write blog posts and log out. I am still connected with the ones I love though, and enjoy an occasionnal chat with my firends, but nothing like the social life I used to have as a roleplayer. Much less drama, too, which is a nice change. I've cleaned my friendslist from all the people who were not really friends. Acquaintances disappeared, I only stick to what and who matters. In that same Idea, I've been cleaning my inventory and found some cute things I didn't even know I had, and some ugly things I don't have anymore already...

My RL is changing too, slowly but surely. My divorce was settled a few days ago, and it feels good to know that chapter is over. Good to know also that the man I was married to is now a precious friend. Funny how my RL can be drama-less (just had the easiest divorce ever) and my SL... not so much. *giggles*

mercredi 2 décembre 2009

Betrayal and ugly people...

Ah... don't you just luuurve drama? I personnally don't. Really. But it seems SL is full of people who have nothing else to do with their lives... Probably their RL is so flat and uninteresting they need to go watergate on any glitch in their SL, they need to find people to adore and be "loyal" to, even the most ordinary manipulative power hungry control freak... Anyway, they do it at the cost of what, to me, is the most precious thing, friendship and trust. And that makes me angry. All I wish to mommy's good little puppy dog is a life at her image, full of hypocrisy and betrayal, and to her "boss", just that one day all the hurtful things she's said and done get back to her face, not even stronger, no, just AS strong as what she gave.
My only consolation is that my pixelated soulmate left before he could see that...
You, reader, don't know me, or barely, but let me tell you one thing, I put trust and friendship above these ridiculous control wars, and I keep my conscience clear.
Anyway, I spilled my guts and I am not going to bore you any longer with my anger and bitterness, especially since they never stay long...

Now, what to do next? Since what was my home for the past 2 years will never be an option again (and you know what? Their loss). I think I'll deal with the blogging for a while, that, at least, is a safe thing, plus showing people the work of designers I appreciate as creators and friends is very satisfying, even if their creations, at least what SL can see of them, are only pixels, these people are true artists and generous and kind souls:
Aryanna DeCuir (Geisha Dreams Skins)
Kouse Singh (Kouse's Sanctum)
Lano Ling (Poetic Colors)
Dimawa Capalini (D'Signs)
Boaz Sands (Simply Fae) ...
Just thank you.

See you on Fae in the Wardrobe